When it comes to starting the 30 Day Sanity Challenge tomorrow, I am both pumped and slightly terrified.
While I think most people perceive me as pretty easy-going (I'm not going to fight you over which restaurant we go to, and if you'd rather we go solo or with a group of friends, no big deal to me), I'm finding that on the inside? I don't deal as well with change as I'd like.
Which means, I'm totally like a cat after a big move. I'll act kind of normal and cuddly and sweet on the outside, but in the meantime I'm peeing on your bed.
So when I look at my Google Reader, and it looks like this...
...and I know tomorrow that I've gotta cut to much, much less than that (what's 1,000+ minus five?), it's hard to make complete sense of.
The sucky thing is, I work at being self-aware enough to understand that I'm less afraid of the external change of routine, and much, much more nervous about what sort of whatnot re-focusing my mind and throwing out digital clutter will dredge up.
Because I know that I'm much more tied to the frenzy than I'd like...frenzy, in fact, allows me to avoid a whole-shit ton of accountability and responsibility with the things that really matter.
Of course, you all get to come along for that ride as I soul-puke it here. Let the meltdown begin. :)
Anyway, enjoy your last few hours of willy-nilly clicking around, tab opening, and generally feeling frazzled. If you're like me, you're on a binge like it's December 31, and you resolved to lose one hundred pounds starting January 1.
See you tomorrow! #30DaystoSanity