The Dark Side of Healthy Living

There's a dark side to healthy living that's being kept from you by health and fitness professionals.  Here are three secrets no health professional will ever tell you.

1.  You'll want less naps--Imagine my surprise one Sunday when I discovered I not only didn't want a nap, but I also WANTED TO TAKE A RUN INSTEAD.  Disgusting.  Also, vomit.  If I knew who to sue for this aggregious reversal in my energy stores, I'd take 'em straight to court.

2.  You'll want less junk food--I love donuts, beer and ice cream to an almost immoral extent.  Now, after eating clean and working out, I've found that it's ridiculously easy to steer clear of these foods OR if I do indulge in one of these foods, to put in a few extra minutes on the treadmill.  Horrible.  What happened to the good old days of feeling guilty for eating one and then numbing the pain by eating another?!

3.  You'll feel better about your body--I've spent several long and lovely years loathing my body and now I'm all like, "Damn, Body, I didn't know you could move like that, Girl!"  It's just terrible because my poor body image allowed me to eat more donuts and take more naps, and we all know that those two things have gone straight into the shitter.

So be very, very careful about cleaning your life up and making healthy choices.  You may regret it.