In the meantime, here are three ways the universe has been screwing with my life.
1. The bittersweet success of giving up dairy--I've been eliminating dairy from my life. The more research I do on it, the more it makes sense to cut it out of my diet. And man, does my body appreciate my decision. I've felt cleaner and lighter, and my asthma and allergies are improved. But DAMMIT, I LOVE dairy! Like, cheese is my boo. I've been having a dirty love affair with Kraft Dinner since I was three years old...and now I know that kind of food makes me feel way shitty. I've found some passable substitutes, but yeah...sigh.
2. Breaking out like a teenager--I've always been really lucky to have nice skin, but lately I've been breaking out like a thirteen year old boy with poor hygiene and an affinity for sour candy and Cheetos. Is it connected to my dairy abstinence? I don't know, but I suppose the upside is that I might look younger with this pizza face? Er...probably not.
3. Terrible, recurring dreams about losing kittens--If you'd like to make someone like me who is both a) slightly neurotic and b) a raging animal lover, please, please send her dreams where she loses part of a litter of kittens. Oh, there are the cute orange ones...but where is the little black one?! And the gray ones?! I hear them crying, but can't find them! Are they in trouble? In pain? Awful.
How does the universe screw with your life?